The Complete Groupie Trilogy Page 31

  And I had done nothing but hurt him. Our whole relationship had been a series of my either using him or running to him to help another man. He had done nothing but love me, and already I had disappointed him, teased him, betrayed him, broken his heart and now… possibly killed him.

  I might as well have fired the gun myself.

  The doctor finally entered a few minutes into my pity party, and he too offered me a reassuring smile. He explained that I did have a broken rib from the impact of my fall with Graham, but aside from some internal bruising I was very lucky to walk away from the incident as injury free as I did.

  “And what about Graham?” I asked. “The one who was shot?”

  He sighed as he perched on the bed. “The situation is still critical,” he said. The entry of the bullet went into his spine, and they’ve taken him into surgery to help control the bleeding and remove the bullet, if possible.”

  “Will he be okay?” I asked.

  “The first few days are critical,” he repeated. “Your friend has lost a lot of blood.” He patted my leg. “We’re doing everything we can, Miss Foster. Meanwhile you do what you can to get better.”

  I nodded. “And Vanni?”

  The doctor smiled even wider. “If you mean that long haired man sitting outside in the waiting room, he’s fine. Except he’s worried sick about you. But I think that’s one problem we can easily remedy.”

  He departed and a minute later Vanni rushed in. He was still covered in blood, Graham’s blood I thought to myself with a lump in my throat. He knelt by the gurney and took my hand in his. I could tell he’d been crying. “Oh Andy,” he said. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’m so sorry.”

  I shook my head. “Don’t apologize,” I said softly as I touched his hair. I felt like I should apologize for trying to stay with Graham and proclaiming my love for him, but I couldn’t form the words.

  Truth was I did love Graham, and I didn’t regret a thing I said to him. Especially if it was the last thing he ever heard, which it very well could have been.

  “It was Talia,” he said. “Despite everything we did she showed up anyway. I can’t believe she nearly killed you.”

  I closed my eyes and leaned back on the bed. “Where is she now?”

  “They shot her. She’s dead. It’s over,” he said as he took me into his arms.

  But the damage was far from over. Even though Vanni and I were okay, Graham stayed in surgery for 12 hours as the doctors tried to repair as much of his spine as they could. When it was over they couldn’t promise us anything. He may never walk again if he woke up, and waking up itself was iffy.

  They released me the following day, after observation, but Vanni and I both decided to stay at the hospital. We waited in the ICU waiting room sitting side by side and silent. Both of us felt enormously guilty about Graham’s condition, and it was driving a definite wedge between us.

  He didn’t ask me about my proclamations of love, even though I knew damned well he had heard it. Instead we said nothing and let the weight of our guilt and uncertainty hover over our heads like the sword of Damocles.

  He brought me tea and food, because I steadfastly refused to leave the waiting room until we knew Graham had awakened. As such Vanni wasn’t leaving me anymore than I was leaving Graham. He took care of all the rescheduling of the tour, and sent the guys home to wait for news of when it would resume.

  The tabloids had a field day, and actually uncovered what we had not been able to previously. This included the mysterious, and now questionable, death of Talia’s husband, who had gotten mysteriously sick and lingered for months until he finally died.

  The court ordered an exhumation, but the tabloids seemed fairly convinced they’d find she was slowly poisoning him to both get rid of him and get her hands on his insurance money. It was the kind of thing gossip rags jonesed for, and with this headline making stuff they had hit pay dirt.

  Los Angeles authorities re-opened Tawnie’s suicide when her hotel roommate from the event that had found the body said that Tawnie and Talia had quarreled several times over the fan weekend. This included the day she ended up taking her life.

  Now that we could all see how deeply disturbed she was, we could easily tie the missing pieces together in retrospect, but it was too little, too late for way too many.

  By the third day Graham finally started to come to. He called for me so the nurses allowed me into the room, alone, to be with him.

  He was drugged and in pain, but when he opened those beautiful warm brown eyes I cried in relief. “Andy,” he croaked. “You’re here.”

  “Where else would I be, silly?” I said softly as he leaned forward to kiss his forehead. I took his hand in mine and he squeezed it gently, which for some reason made giddy with hope. Possibly because it was tangible proof he was strong enough to hang on for dear life. I was so thankful I brought his hand to my mouth and kissed it.

  “Don’t leave,” he managed before his eyes fluttered shut again. I sobbed quietly as I clasped his hand in mine.

  “I won’t,” I promised. To Graham. To myself… and even to God.

  I’d do anything to make sure he would recover.

  Days later we learned that recovery from injuries like the one Graham sustained were highly unpredictable. He may be paralyzed from the waist down for the rest of his life, or he may walk again after extensive therapy. With the bullet removed and the spinal cord repaired as much as possible, it was all up to Graham and to luck.

  He’d start his recovery at the hospital in Philadelphia, and would eventually go back to Los Angeles in need of long-term, live-in care. Graham’s eyes met mine when the doctor asked if there was anyone who could stay with him, and it was a pleading look I could not deny. I went to him and took his hand in mine.

  “I’ll be there,” I said softly, and looked down at Graham. “However long it takes.” Graham smiled at me and covered my hand with his other hand.

  I didn’t even look back at Vanni, who had been standing next to me as we listened to the doctor’s prognosis. I knew how bad this looked, but I couldn’t help that. Graham needed me and I was going to be there. And by God he would walk again if I had anything to say about it.

  Vanni was silent after we left the room, and didn’t really say anything much at all as we rode back to the hotel. My own mind was reeling with all the things that had to be done to get my house closed up in Nashville, to make the trip out west. I’d stay with Graham, of course, in the guest room like before. That way I could be close whenever he needed me.

  When we closed the hotel room door behind us, Vanni wordlessly pulled out his suitcase and set it on the bed.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  “Packing,” he replied. “I’m going back to Los Angeles. I have a tour to finish. You’re obviously going to have your hands full here.”

  “Vanni…”

  He swung on me and flung something my direction. “I guess you won’t need that anymore.”

  I glanced down at the floor. It was a house key. “What is this for?”

  “My new place,” he said as he turned back to his suitcase. “I was going to ask you to move in with me but I guess you’re going to have a much nicer house on the beach when you get to L.A.”

  I reached for his arm. “Vanni…”

  “We almost made it,” he said without looking at me.

  “You’re talking like it’s over. It isn’t over, Vanni.”

  “It isn’t?” he challenged as he looked my way. “What if Graham never recovers?”

  “Don’t say that.”

  “But it’s a real possibility, isn’t it? And yet you still chose to go with him. However long it takes,” he reminded with a snarl.

  “What the hell is wrong with you?” I snapped as I sprung off the bed. My furor was only matched by my fear, that he could really be ready to leave me over this. “Where do you get off being mad at me for trying to take care of someone? Are you forgetting all the times I had to wait in line for yo
u for no other reason than your precious image?”

  He didn’t care much for the comparison. “This isn’t some random guy. This is a guy who has my entire career in his hands. If you think we can just pick up and carry on in Los Angeles then you’re deluding yourself. This is different and you know it.”

  “No, I don’t know it,” I said. “It seems to me you think you can just keep me on the chain whenever it’s convenient and I’m supposed to dump everything and everyone whenever you decide to crook your little finger. You really are an arrogant son of a bitch sometimes.”

  He glared at me. “You know that Lourdes wasn’t a real relationship, and I couldn’t help I fell in love with Kat. It’s not like you’re in love with Graham.” I said nothing which made him pause. “Are you?”

  “He doesn’t have anyone else!” I tried to explain. Certainly not anyone he loved enough to nearly die for.

  “He’s got money. He could hire people to care for him. Why does it have to be you?”

  I sighed as I flopped on the bed. “It just does,” I said softly. “Graham took the bullet that was meant for me. If he hadn’t… I’d be the one who would need to learn how to walk again, and I know that Graham would take care of me if the situation had been reversed.”

  Vanni swung around. “And you don’t think I would have, is that it?”

  I looked up at where he stood towering over me. It took me a long time to answer, and when I did, I did so quietly. “I don’t think you could.”

  Vanni said nothing for a long moment, and I could tell by his clenching jaw I had broken something in him.

  “I guess that’s it then,” he said through clenched teeth. His eyes were rimmed red with unshed tears. He stooped and retrieved his key.

  “I still love you,” I said as I reached for him, but he spun out of my grasp. I watched helplessly as he finished packing and zipped his case shut. “Vanni, please!”

  When he looked back at me there were tears on his cheeks. “See you in L.A.,” he said softly. “Boss.”

  He stomped from the hotel room. My whole body felt numb and hollow as I glanced down at the bracelet on my wrist, a haunting reminder of what almost was.

  All I could do was pray that I would be able to fix everything when I got out to Los Angeles. Once I got Graham mobile and independent again, I could prove to Vanni that I wouldn’t be the woman he loved if I could walk out on the man who saved me, and that same woman was ready to fight just as hard to win him back as well.

  My mouth settled in a firm line as I determined this wasn’t the end. It was just the beginning. And I would do anything necessary to reclaim my happy ending that Talia had done her best to steal.

  BOOK 2

  ROCK STAR

  “Told her all I’ll ever want and all I’ll ever need is just enough to make me leave…”

  “She Waits” – Zero 1 featuring Hal Sparks

  http://halsparks.com

  Chapter One

  July 1, 2010. Los Angeles

  Vanni

  Giovanni Carnevale dragged the suitcase behind him as he let himself into the sunny oceanfront house in Redondo Beach, California. The wall facing the Pacific was almost entirely glass from the ceiling to the floor. An amazing southern California sunset filtered in, casting a vibrant orange glow across the hardwood floors and eggshell colored walls. A black fireplace sat in one corner, a spiral staircase up to the loft bedroom above wound against another, but one’s eye immediately drew to that spectacular view as the focal point of the room. His interior decorator had positioned a cozy leather sectional couch facing the windows at Vanni’s request. From the instant he saw it Vanni fantasized about all the sunsets that he would share with Andy there.

  His throat closed up just to think of her. Ever since he left her in that Philadelphia hotel room he felt like a half of his heart was missing. He had gone to Philadelphia to piece together this next chapter of his life. He’d waited a long time for it, even longer than the music, and he was finally ready to jump off the cliff certain someone would finally be there to catch him. It took him a long time to figure out that someone was Andy, and so once he decided to give over his heart he never dreamed that she wouldn’t be standing right there beside him upon this auspicious homecoming.

  He left the suitcase at the door and walked over to the open kitchen just off to the right of his entryway. The fridge was pretty bare given that he had been out of town for the last few weeks. There were some non-perishable staples around the cabinets but it was clear he’d have to make a trip to the market at some point.

  He barely even wanted to leave the house.

  What did sit in the fridge were a few bottles of expensive champagne. These were to celebrate the beginning of his and Andy’s new life together. It never occurred to him that she’d ever say no. Sure they had had their problems but he knew she loved him. He knew that he was stitched just as deeply under her skin as she was under his.

  This was why they had spent the last few years alternately running towards and running away from each other. He was stupid, he knew, to have used other women just to ensure she could never hurt him… even when she’d never given him any indication that she would. But no one knew more than Vanni himself that he’d ultimately let her down.

  He knew he couldn’t bear it if he gave his heart away once more only to watch the person he entrusted with it squeeze it dry in a bloody grip. He couldn’t stand the idea someone else he depended on to love and protect him would figure out he didn’t deserve it and would ultimately move on down the road to something, or someone, else.

  And yet as he popped the cork on that first bottle of champagne, he knew he couldn’t deny that was exactly what had happened. All this time he thought he could fool her into thinking he could be her knight in shining armor, her rock and roll fantasy come true. But when push came to shove, it was another man who rode to her rescue.

  And that was the man she ultimately chose.

  He snarled as he thought of Graham. Lucky bastard. He had money. He had power. He’d already had two other wives. And now he had Andy too. She was too kind and too good hearted to leave him after he had become disabled from taking her bullet. That bitch Talia had done more harm by shooting Graham than had she actually shot Andy.

  Even as he had the thought he shook it right out of his head. Andy was gone but she wasn’t dead. He’d lost too many people he loved; he didn’t think he could bear it if she wasn’t still on this earth with him in some way. That was the only thing that kept him from walking right out the door and right into the ocean. He couldn’t imagine a world where he’d never be able to look into her sparkling hazel eyes, smell the perfume from her skin, or take those luscious curves into his arms once again whether or not they were his to claim.

  Only the sad truth remained she was as far away as the moon. Everything he loved about her was completely out of reach now. Graham’s needs would trump Vanni’s desires for the immediate future. Who knew how long it would take Graham to heal, if he ever would?

  Worse, in all the time it would take for him to recuperate Andy was sure to figure out which of the two of them was the best choice for her: Graham, who jumped in front of the bullet, rather than Vanni, who ran away.

  Fresh tears sprung in his eyes when he remembered that fateful day. Everything happened so quickly, but it ran in a recurring loop in slow motion in his brain. He saw every missed opportunity to protect Andy from the psychopath Vanni himself had inadvertently aimed her direction. He saw the gun and he did what any kid from the streets of Philadelphia and New York would do… he dove for cover. It was a reflex, he didn’t even think about it.

  But Graham did. Graham saw where that gun was aimed and was ready to throw his body in the path of that bullet just to save the woman Vanni understood they both loved. Apparently, in that moment, the only one that counted, Graham loved her more.

  Vanni ignored his tears as he threw back the bottle and chugged the expensive, effervescent liquid just like water. He want
ed to forget. He needed to forget. But how could he? Everything in this new place was designed to share specifically with Andy. There was a brand new cat tower for Simon, and the metronome she had purchased for him sat atop the piano which sprawled under the stairs. He had made his life her life, this woman who had done what no other woman before her had been given a chance to do – she had rejected him.

  He walked over to the piano and plopped down onto the bench. He placed the bottle of champagne next to the metronome, which he wound to start. His fingers touched the cool keys of the piano, which slowly and unconsciously found their way through the very first song he ever wrote for her. He remembered how feverishly he wrote that song after he returned from Philadelphia, unable to get those piercing eyes and luscious lips out of his head. All he had wanted was a kiss and she was gone.

  Like now.

  “Does she know how I feel?” he sang softly with a catch in his voice. “How much I want this to be real. An angel from a dream I can’t claim…”

  His voice trailed off as tear splashed against his fingers.

  With a growl he launched into an angry song of betrayal. Why was he crying for someone who left him for another man? She was the one who killed their dream. She was no angel. She was heartless, cruel. Worst of all she had figured out his dark secret, that he didn’t deserve her, and she went to the man who clearly did.

  He slammed the wooden fallboard down with a loud bang. Out of frustration he slammed it again and again, gratified by the harsh sound bouncing off of the tall walls of his new place.

  Their new place, he reminded himself. And she’d never even see it. It would be Graham’s house she’d return to when she finally came to Los Angeles. A sloping mansion atop a Malibu cliff it would have taken at least ten of Vanni’s new dwellings to completely fill.

  Each thought swept through his head with loud rhythmic ticking of the metronome. He grabbed the bottle of champagne for another glug while he glared at the antique atop his piano. Anger welled up inside of him until it exploded through his lips in an impassioned roar. He kicked back the bench as he rose and took a swing at the metronome with the champagne bottle. Glass shattered along with any liquid that was left in the bottle across the keys.